Tuesday, October 30, 2012

. . . About a Repeat Customer?

Here I sit in my den waiting for Howard the Hawk to return for breakfast again this morning but he's a no show.  He's probably dining at the Murphy Mansion across the street.

Guess I shouldn't be surprised.  Like many of us, he probably likes variety; Monday I'll stop by McDonald's for a sausage biscuit with egg then on Tuesday I'll visit Panera's for quiche.  Of course eating at an up-scale joint with high brow music comes at a price so maybe back to McDonald's (my house / tree) tomorrow.

Monday, October 29, 2012

What's for Breakfast

Watched as a feathered friend enjoyed breakfast this morning.  I'm not a fan of raw meat but he seemed to be enjoying it.

Note:  Pretty hard to see the above (or maybe I'm just old and eyesight isn't what it used to be).  Anyway, if you click on the following link you should see a more robust version of the video.


Tuesday, October 23, 2012

About Kids

Received from my brother-in-law and thought it was worth keeping.
GOD CREATED CHILDREN

(AND IN THE PROCESS, GRANDCHILDREN!)


To those of us who have children in our lives,
whether they are our own, grandchildren,
nieces, nephews, or students...
here is something to make you chuckle.

Whenever your children are out of control,
you can take comfort from the thought that even
God's omnipotence did not extend to His own children.

After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing he said was 'DON'T

'Don't what?' Adam replied.

'Don't eat the forbidden fruit.' God said.

'Forbidden fruit?
We have forbidden fruit?
Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit! '

' No Way ! ' 

'Yes way! 

'Do NOT eat the fruit! ' said God.

'Why? '

'Because I am your Father and I said so! '
God replied, wondering
why He hadn't stopped creation after making the elephants.

A few minutes later, God saw His children
having an apple break and He was ticked!
'Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit?'
God asked.


'Uh huh,' Adam replied.

'Then why did you' said the Father.

'I don't know,' said Eve.
'She started it!' Adam said.

'Did not ! '
'Did too! '
'DID NOT! '

Having had it with the two of them,
God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own.
Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. 


If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom
and they haven't taken it, don't be hard on yourself.

If God had trouble raising children, what makes you think
it would be a piece of cake for you ?

THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !

1. You spend the first two years of their life teaching them to walk and talk.
Then you spend the next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up.

2. Grandchildren are God's reward for not killing your own children.

3. Mothers of teens now know why some animals eat their young.

4. Children seldom misquote you. In fact, they usually repeat
word for word what you shouldn't have said.

5. The main purpose of holding children's parties
is to remind yourself that there are children more awful than your own.

6. We childproofed our homes, but they are still getting in.



ADVICE FOR THE DAY:

Be nice to your kids..
They will choose your nursing home one day!

AND FINALLY:


IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSION AND YOU GET A HEADACHE,
DO WHAT IT SAYS ON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE:


'TAKE TWO ASPIRIN' AND 'KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN'!!!!!

Quick, send this on to ten people within the next five minutes.
Nothing will happen if you don't, but if you do,
Ten people will be laughing!!!


Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Who Cares About the General State of Things???

This just seemed appropriate for this blog:

Over five thousand years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel ,"Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and camels, and I will lead you to the Promised Land."Nearly 75 years ago, (when Welfare was introduced) Roosevelt said,"Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, and light up a Camel, this is the Promised Land."Today, Congress has stolen your shovel, taxed your asses, raised the price of Camels and mortgaged the Promised Land!  I was so depressed last night thinking about Health Care Plans, the economy, the wars, lost jobs, savings, Social Security, retirement funds, etc. 

.... I called a Suicide Hotline.I had to press 1 for English.I was connected to a call center in Pakistan . I told them I was suicidal.They got excited and asked if I could drive a truck......Folks, we're screwed.